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Thursday, July 10, 2008

Silly*

Remember the silly-putty from my last post?
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Here it is after picking at it for while, trying the ice cube trick on it, (can we say, yeah right?), and after calling my husband for tips. My husband is a carpet and upholstery guy and he just sort of made a noise in response to my request for a magic silly-putty removal formula. It wasn't a good noise. It was a, "I didn't like the covers for those benches anyway," sort of noise. So of course I had to turn to my true partner-in-life for advice. Google.

Google told me to use rubbing alchohol and q-tips.
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It started well, with putty succumbing to alcohol soaked q-tips with ease.

However, as it progressed, things weren't working as I planned. See, I expected to be all smug when my husband came home. Like a, "look how I saved the $4.00 clearance curtains turned into cushions that are already snagged to heck but no longer have a silly-putty stain," kind of smugness. Take that, mister negative carpet man.

But the alcohol didn't totally work. And its lack of working caused me anxiety. And the anxiety caused me to scrub, and all good wives of upholstery techs know you never, ever, ever scrub. Just blot. With water, or vinegar if you must get crazy. Not me though. I got all frenzied, ruin-the-fibers kind of rub-it-off-with-friction kind of scrubbing with the rubbing alcohol. Sort of hoping the heat from the friction would ignite the alcohol and settle the whole matter in a much more satisfyingly dramatic way. But no.

Instead I got this:
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Not so bad really. Nothing photoshop can't cure. And for the real life folk who will see this in person, trust me, it won't be like, "Oh no, YOU have a stain on your furniture?" I mean, you should see my carpet. Oh yeah. We don't have much carpet. Only two rooms in our house really. My magic ability to attract impossible stains took care of that pesky carpet problem long ago.

You heard it from a reliable source people, a carpet cleaner's wife. You don't want stains? Then rip the carpet out. There are places that will take it for recycling even. I mean, this post wouldn't even exist if my son had been playing with the putty on our laminate floor. But not if you live in my town, of course. If you live here keep your carpet and call my husband because other than his obvious lacking in silly-putty wisdom, he does a pretty swell job. And of course, mama needs new bench cushions, and $4.00 clearance curtains don't grow on trees now do they?

* This post is brought to you by the ill effects of rubbing alcohol fumes and the fact that my husband doesn't read my blog, unless I make him, and even then I suspect he is faking.

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